Casey: In your title, Taking on the Big Boys, who are the “big boys”? How do they operate?

Bravo: The “big boys” are the powers that be. They are the people who control how and when we do our work, influence public policy, and often have a stake in maintaining the status quo, as they benefit from it. Some of the “big boys” are women, but the majority of men are not “big boys.” “Big boys” often maintain the status quo in place by using approaches that trivialize, patronize, “catastrophize,” demonize, and compartmentalize. When talking about the problems people face in managing work and family, they say things like “Well, women can do whatever they want! If they’re not represented in the best jobs, it’s because they have chosen not to pursue those jobs!” or “Men want to take leaves because they want to go hunting and fishing! They don’t care about their babies.” Another common response is “You don’t understand how business works, so you suggest these pie-in-the-sky ideas.” Finally, rather than addressing problems with the way work is structured, they suggest that if, mothers are unhappy with their lives, they should fight each other in the so-called “mommy wars,” as opposed to fighting for changes within the workplace and the home. My purpose in writing this book was to expose these tactics, explain how they work, and show that with the right analysis and organization, it is possible to take them on. The “big boys” try to imply that there is no need to take them on, that if workers are upset they need to change themselves, and even if you did attempt to take the big boys on, you can’t win. Giving concrete examples of how people have made changes in the workplace can inspire others to take action.

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Leading Worries of All Working Women